Mother's Day Good and Funny Jokes for Kids

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It's fun time now to enjoy these Mother's Day good and funny jokes for kids and have a good laugh with our dear moms. We love our moms, and we are only joking.

Mother's Day Good and Funny Jokes for Kids


Mother's Day Good and Funny Jokes for Kids

The Stages Of Motherhood


Here is a light hearted presentation of what we all think about our moms, at different points of our lives. Don't get surprised because we all have the same tendency towards our mothers!

4 Years Of Age — My Mommy can do anything;
8 Years Of Age — My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot
12 Years Of Age -My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.
14 Years Of Age -Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either
16 Years Of Age -Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned
18 Years Of Age -That old woman? She's way out of date
25 Years Of Age -Well, she might know a little bit about it
35 Years Of Age -Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion
45 Years Of Age -Wonder what Mom would have thought about it
65 Years Of Age -Wish, I could talk it over with Mom

Picking up things!


Miss Jones had just given her second-grade students a science lesson. She had explained about magnets, and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now it was question time.
Miss Jones said, «My name begins with the letter 'M' and I pick up things. What am I?»
A little boy in the front row proudly said, «You're a mother!

*** *** ***

A mother is trying to get her son to eat carrots. “Carrots are good for your eyes,” she says.
“How do you know?” the boy asks.
The mother replies, “Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?”

Submitted by Niles L., Acton, Mass.

Punished


A little girl came home from school and said to her mother, „Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do.“

The mother exclaimed, 'But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this… by the way, what was it that you didn't do?'

The little girl replied, 'My homework.'

*** *** ***

Last year on Mother’s Day we had a big family get-together. Afterwards my Mom starting getting ready to do the dishes.
Of course I couldn’t let her do that on her special day.
I said, “Leave the dishes, Mom. You can always do them tomorrow.”

*** *** ***

I asked my Mom what she wanted for Mother’s Day.
She said, “Thanks son, but all I want is a bit of caring and looking after.”
So I put her in a nursing home.

Joining the Army


As the family gathered for a big dinner together, the youngest son announced that he had just signed up at an army recruiter's
office.

There were audible gasps around the table, then some laughter, as his older brothers shared their disbelief that he could handle
this new situation. „Oh, come on, quit joking,“ snickered one. „You didn't really do that, did you?“

»You would never get through basic training," scoffed another.

The new recruit looked to his mother for help, but she was just gazing at him. When she finally spoke, she simply asked, «Do you really plan to make your own bed every morning?»

*** *** ***

I shouted to my Mom on Mother’s Day, “How does breakfast in bed sound?”
She said, “Ooh that sounds lovely!
I said, “Great, I’ll have bacon, fries and two eggs.”

*** *** ***

A mother mouse and a baby mouse are walking along when suddenly a cat attacks them. The mother mouse shouts “BARK!” and the cat runs away. “See?” the mother mouse says to her baby. “Now do you see why it’s important to learn a foreign language?”

Submitted by William E., Morganton, N.C.

Baby sitting


A young man agreed to baby-sit one night so a single mother could have an evening out. At bedtime he sent the youngsters upstairs to bed and settled down to watch football.

One child kept creeping down the stairs, but the young man kept sending him back to bed.

At 9pm the doorbell rang, it was the next-door neighbor, Mrs. Brown, asking whether her son was there. The young man brusquely replied, «No.»

Just then a little head appeared over the banister and shouted, «I'm here, Mom, but he won't let me go home!»

Delicious


Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother.

The first said, «I built a big house for our mother.»

The second said," I sent her a Mercedes with a driver."

The third smiled and said, «I've got you, both beat. You know how Mom enjoys the Bible, and you know she can't see very well. I sent her a brown parrot that can recite the entire Bible. It took 20 monks in a monastery 12 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $100,000.00 a year for 10 years, but it was worth it. Mom just has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot will recite it.»

Soon thereafter, Mom sent out her letters of thanks: «Milton,» she wrote the first son, «The house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house.»

«Marvin,» she wrote to another, «I am too old to travel. I stay home all the time, so I never use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!»

«Dearest Melvin,» she wrote to her third son, «You were the only son to have the good sense to know what your mother likes. That chicken was delicious.»

Did you enjoy your first day?


The mother says to her daughter, «Did you enjoy your first day at school?»
The daughter answers, «First day? Do you mean I have to go back again tomorrow?»

Girl or boy?


A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl?
B: It's a girl. She's my daughter.
A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father.
B: I'm not. I'm her mother.

What my mother taught me!


My mother taught me LOGIC:
«If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go to the store with me.»

My mother taught me MEDICINE:
«If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way.»

My mother taught me TO THINK AHEAD:
«If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job!»

My mother taught me ESP:
«Put your sweater on; don't you think that I know when you're cold?»

My mother taught me TO MEET A CHALLENGE:
«What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you...Don't talk back to me!»

My mother taught me HUMOR:
«When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.»

My mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT:
«If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.

My mother taught me ABOUT MARRIAGE:
»How do you think you got here?"

My mother taught me about GENETICS:
«You are just like your father!»

My mother taught me about my ROOTS:
«Do you think you were born in a barn?»

My mother taught me about the WISDOM of AGE:
«When you get to be my age, you will understand.»

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION:
«Just wait until your father gets home.»

My mother taught me about RECEIVING:
«You are going to get it when we get home.»

And my all time favorite thing, JUSTICE:
«One day you will have kids, and I hope they turn out just like YOU… then you'll see what it's like.»

Mother's Day Good and Funny Jokes for Kids

Yuo'll find a number of interesting mothers day craft ideas for kids here.

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